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The blesses and stresses
Losing my way through life and anxiety
I’m the kind of person who has to follow my heart and explore what inspires me. I have ups and downs. I always have, I always will.
When I commit to something, rightly or wrongly, my heart and mind go deep into it. I find it hard to switch off. I definitely give too much of myself sometimes.
This way of being is a part of me. When I show up somewhere, it’s because I care deeply. Infact, I would even go as far as saying that I can’t show up unless I care.
Productivity and self-care speak will say to not give too much of yourself. I say “this is me”. I recognise it and I find ways for life to work for me.
I make things happen. Not always, of course, but my goal is really to only work on things where I feel I can have an impact. I cannot bear not trying to make that real difference.
More recently, I’ve having more downs than I like and I’ve been struggling to pinpoint the why.
I even tweeted this. Because my life IS truly amazing. Really.
Sometimes we need to tilt our heads to see the amazingness of it. Or, like my girl said as she put on her first set of glasses ✨ “Everything looks shiny. ✨
However, we can have an amazing life and still feel stressed. The anxiety has been creeping in for me.
I have plenty of reasons to be stressed and overwhelmed. I am not here to share them.
I also have just as many, if not more reasons to be very happy. I know this. And it’s helpful to look back at certain points in my life to see how far I have come. I’m so lucky. So very lucky.
I am blessed and stressed!
I tend to talk more about the blessings because it keeps me going in a more positive way, but it feels wrong not to address the stresses.
Writing helps me address them. The tweet. This post. Conversations I have within the communities and with the people around me. My husband who is always there to listen and support whatever decision I make.
I went through a really good few weeks on focusing on one thing a day. Then life got overwhelming. I’m going back to that, but with greater clarity of what I want and where I want to be.
Time will tell what that will actually look like, but I can assure you that it involves a lot more touching grass.
I love the internet, but my heart tells me there are more problems to solve by getting out there in the real world. ❤️
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